Tell me the old, old story

 Pontprennau Community Church sent their resident author/sports journalist David Collins along to a different kind of fixture recently. David attended a URC lay preaching training weekend in Llandrindod Wells. Here is his ‘match report.’ 

Most lay preacher training involves theological study, practical skills development, and a focus on scripture and sermon delivery. 

The theme of this weekend was “A church made of parables.” Old stories if you like. It offered many treats. 

First into bat, was the highly entertaining Revd Susan Durber. 

Susan introduced familiar parables, using pictures and anecdotes to bring well-known stories to life. 

But she did more than that. 

‘Swinging her bat around with glee,’ she unpacked these well-known fables in a new way. She questioned, criticised and analysed. Susan set challenging inquisitions for us, based upon ancient stories which had first spread via oral history. 

The parables contained many mysteries. 

Were they stories, or miracles? Did these old tales still hold a message for us in 2025? Did the very titles mislead us? Was the parable of the mustard seed really about a mustard seed – and can that seed become a tree? Were these parables, or miracles? They present many unexpected events. 

My favourite biblical character is Thomas. He asks really good questions. Or, as a former vicar once articulated, “setting up Jesus for some of his best lines.” 

I doubt if Susan knew this, but she introduced the Gospel of Thomas, which had failed to make the Starting XI when Team Bible was selected. That brought my first Google of the weekend. One of many as it turned out. 

Susan warmed to her theme, suggesting how each of us could take our personal messages form the parables. One of her slides used a picture of a Manic Street Preachers album. “This is my truth, tell me yours” I thought.

Ask me about F.O.A.M too by the way. I will use that in my next service. 

If Day 1 had been about questions and interrogation, Day 2 offered practical, how-to-do-it advice. 

Susan again led the proceedings. She discussed Praying the Parables. We contemplated the Parable of the Persistent Friend. ‘Seek and ye shall find.’ Be bold in your faith. Proverbs 28:1. Google it. 

Susan elaborated, as she set us an exercise. “Write a Collect” she suggested. We had a go. 

A prayer in three parts: 

Dear God,

Please grant us……

Through Jesus Christ our Lord etc…..

Harder than it looks, believe me.

Next to step up to the crease, was Revd David Salisbury. What a teacher this guy was. 

David invited us to draft the key elements of a service. Which bit goes where? Should the notices come at the beginning? Prepare/Hear/Respond: So what does ‘Respond’ involve?

The delegates used cut ‘n paste notes to debate the correct batting order for these elements. I was dismissed by a Googly from a colleague from Wrexham. No VAR at this venue sorry. 

The day concluded with a demonstration of Lay Pastoral Supervision (Revd Kathryn Price) and a deeply personal reflection on the Parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector from Heather Phillips. Luke 18: 9-14. “This is my truth, tell me yours.”

This course had been the ultimate Game of Three Halves, as Sunday morning brought direct advice for the practitioners.

Megan Price led a stimulating session on voice projection. Breath, resonance, diction. Shout at the wall and listen to the echo. Avoid carpets which suck up the sound. I yelled Taylor Swift lyrics at a stoney canvass. Taylor yelled back. 

Claire Boot also discussed physical aspects of our surroundings, as she used parables to highlight important isSusans for church buildings. Was your church built on stoney ground? Are your assets stored in bigger barns? Is your money buried in the ground until the master returns, or do you demonstrate a planned approach based on hypothecated reserves and anticipated risks. 

Hypothecated. One of my favourite words. 

This had been a remarkable event. Words, worship and praise, mixed with contemplations to stir the most stable of minds. 

Despite the occasional offside flag and stern glance from match official Maggie Kirkbride, I had lasted the full 90 minutes, so to speak. Sustained by hearty breakfasts and opportunities for further learning, I headed home to Cardiff. Much to contemplate. 

They think it’s all over? It isn’t now.